What is Mutual Masturbation?

Let’s be honest - guessing what gets your partner off can be a minefield. Whether it’s fingers fumbling for the clit or a hand job that misses the mark, touching someone else’s parts isn’t always second nature. That’s where mutual masturbation comes in. And it’s hotter than you think.

What is mutual masturbation?

Mutual masturbation is when two people masturbate together. That might mean watching each other stroke, tease and play solo, or getting hands-on and doing the hard work for each other. You may be lying side by side or maybe doing it over the phone, the important thing is that you’re both masturbating at the same time. It’s raw, unfiltered and a brilliant way to learn what actually gets your partner off.

Benefits of mutual masturbation

No one makes your morning cuppa quite like you do, and the same goes for orgasms. You know your body best, and your partner knows theirs, but when you let each other in on the secrets, that’s when things really start to get good.

Watching your lover pleasure themselves gives you a front-row seat to everything they love: the pressure, the rhythm, the sounds. And then? You steal their moves. You can use that intel to know how to touch them just right.

We love mutual masturbation for so many reasons, but some of our fave benefits of it are:

• Better communication – you can both learn what each other like and you can communicate this through showing each other.
• Increased intimacy – it helps build trust and emotional closeness.
• Confidence boosting – seeing your partner pleasure themselves, whilst you feel comfortable doing the same, helps boost body confidence and self-awareness.
• Learning and exploration - It can help you both as a couple understand your bodies better, knowing what feels good and how to communicate that.

How to mutually masturbate

Forget scheduling it in like it’s a work meeting. The hottest mutual masturbation moments happen when things are already heating up. Slide the suggestion in mid-kiss. Murmur in their ear, “Wanna show me how you touch yourself?” Then sit back, unzip and enjoy putting on a show.

Whether you go for a mirror session, lay side-by-side with your hands roaming, or try a little top-and-tail (yes, that innocent sleepover term now comes with a whole new meaning), the trick is being able to watch, touch and tease all at once. Try teasing each other while still fully clothed. Or pull out your favourite toys and go head-to-head. Use eye contact, filthy whispers or take a hands-on approach, whatever gets you panting. The more you explore, the filthier it gets.

Mutual masturbation isn’t just a side dish; it’s a full-course feast of hands, toys, moans and mess. It’s intimacy without pressure, exploration without guesswork. And when done right, it’s amazing.

Mutual masturbation positions

1.Talk it out
The perfect couple mutual masturbation position that feels intimate as it’s all about eye contact. Sit at either end of the sofa facing each other, hold each other’s hand and lock in your eye contact. Each of you now start masturbating whilst you maintain eye contact. This position with the deep eye contact may feel a little intimidating at first, but it allows you to see each other’s facial expressions, how you’re enjoying it, and will soon feel like an enjoyable intimate experience.

2. Side by Side
Lay down next to each other, side by side, face to face. Both begin to touch yourselves and allow the intimacy to build up. This position is comfortable and encourages you to remain close to one another, with eye contact heightening your arousal.

3.The 69 with a twist
The 69 is one of our favourite sex positions, so why not make it into a mutual masturbation position? Either lay on top of your partner or side by side, but facing in the opposite direction so your faces are near each other’s genitals. This position will give you both an up close and personal view of each other masturbating, so you can find out exactly what each other like.

4. Show and tell
In this position you need to sit facing each other, leaving enough of a gap so you can see what each other are doing. Then take it in turns to masturbate and show each other what you like. This position can feel a little bit vulnerable as you take it in turns, but it allows you to be fully open with your partner and build on your intimacy. Plus, honesty is always the best policy, and there’s no hiding from honesty with this mutual masturbation position.

5. The air guitar
Stand up, face each other, and each hold a hand about two inches away from your body. When you begin to masturbate, thrust yourself into your hand, rather bringing your hand to you. Trust us on this one, it feels so different, but so good.

Mutual masturbation is playful but intimate and a chance to turn each other on in all the right ways. Whether you’re wanting to learn what it is each other like or it’s simply to build on your connection, relax, lean into the fun and discover what it is we love about mutual masturbation so much.

If you want to up your mutual masturbation game, then our sex toys are built for this. From vibrators that make her hips twitch to strokers designed for slick, powerful pleasure, we’ve got everything you need to tease and be teased. Shop our best couples toys and discover how good it gets when both of you take control.