Lesbian Sex Toys: Everything You Need to Know

Call us biased, but we think all sex is better with sex toys thrown in – and lesbian sex is no different. Whether you’re using them alone or with a partner, there are plenty of great lesbian sex toys out there that guarantee to take those big O’s to new heights.

Of course, this applies whether you’re lesbian, bi, non-binary or trans.

From the best options to spice up your time in the bedroom to a guide to using strap ons, here’s everything you need to know.

How to Use Lesbian Sex Toys

Sex toys and vibrators for lesbians don’t necessarily sit in a category of their own, because the sex toys best suited to you come down completely to individual preferences. This naturally means the question of how to use them is pretty open – it depends on which toy you opt for and what sensations you enjoy.

For lesbian play, some may prefer a toy that focuses solely on external stimulation, some may like to use a strap-on, some may prefer a classic realistic dildo for penetration, and some may prefer penetration with something a little less phallic looking. It’s all about what feels good for you, and there are no rules!

With that said, there are certain types of sex toy that work incredibly for lesbian sex. Here are some of the best sex toys for lesbian couples to have in your collection…

The 5 Best Lesbian Sex Toys

Finger Vibes

If you love a bit of teasing in the bedroom, a finger vibrator should be making its way straight into your toy collection. A finger vibe is great for using all over the body during foreplay, on erogenous zones such as the neck, nipples or inner thighs, or of course, for direct clitoral stimulation.


For external stimulation turned up a notch (or three), check out the powerful vibes that a wand vibrator has to offer. Wands are a true classic in the world of sex toys, and for very good reason – they feel pretty damn amazing! If you want to know more about how to use these toe-curlingly good toys, our Guide to Wand Vibrators tells you all you need to know.


Maybe penetrative play is more your thing? If so, welcome to the world of dildos. There are all kinds of different options here depending on what you enjoy personally, from vibrating dildos or Rabbit dildos to realistic feel dildos.

Whether you’re using a dildo manually on your partner or as part of a strap on set (more on that later!), you don’t have to pick one that looks like a penis. While some enjoy the feelings and textures that a realistic penis dildo brings, there are also sleek options that guarantee equally mind-blowing sensations.

Double-ended Dildos

Two heads are better than one, right? If you have playtime for two in mind, a double-ended dildo promises double the orgasms. Double-ended dildos tend to feature ultra-flexible designs, so they can be used in whichever position you prefer. Again, you can find regular and vibrating options in both realistic and smoother designs so you can experience pleasure your way.

Harnesses and Strap Ons

For hands-free penetrative fun, a harness is a must. You can buy strap ons that already come with everything you need, or you can combine a harness with your favourite strap on dildo to create your own perfect strap on set. Then, harness up and prepare for the ride of your life!

Lesbian Strap On Guide

If you’re here because you want to know more about how to use a strap on to pleasure your partner (or to be pleasured yourself), read on for our top tips.

Choose a Dildo That Suits You

While some will buy a strap on set that arrives ready to go, many couples prefer to buy a separate adjustable harness which can then be used with your own toys. With a harness, a wide range of dildos or vibrators can be used for strap on play – you just need an option with a flared base that can fit within the O-ring of your harness.

As a rule of thumb, if one partner is going to be the receiver, they should get the say when it comes to the size and design of the dildo; it should be something that’s comfortable and pleasurable for them. Like we’ve said, you don’t have to pick a dildo that looks like a penis – there are plenty of sculpted options that are also ideal for use with a harness.

You Don’t Have to Stick to One Position

The idea of a set ‘giver’ and a ‘receiver’ in a same-sex relationship is one that is definitely dated, and often incorrect. While some people may prefer to stick to one or the other when it comes to penetration, many couples are open to mixing it up depending on how they’re feeling.

You should never feel like you need to fit a mould when it comes to your relationship and time in the bedroom – after all, the end goal is pleasure, and that comes in a tonne of different ways! Switching positions and experimenting with power play is a great way to keep things hot and exciting in bed.

Consider Comfort and Quality with Your Harness

When it comes to choosing your harness – or any sex toy, for that matter – quality is key. Buying a cheaply made harness for your strap on is a sure-fire way to send things downhill when getting down and dirty: it could slip off, break, or just be uncomfortable for the wearer. To ensure a pleasurable experience for you both, invest in a high-quality harness that will fit, be comfortable to wear, and will last.

Don’t Forget the Lube!

Did you really think you were going to get through one of our guides without a mention of the good stuff? We always recommend lube to enhance sensations during any kind of sexual play but, with a dildo, more really is more. If you’re enjoying penetrative sex with a strap on dildo, the material can cause more dryness than usual – lube eliminates any of these issues and ensures every sensation feels amazing. Just make sure you’re picking a lube that is safe for use with your toy. To find out more, check out our Guide to Using Lube.

Keep It Clean

We’re talking from a hygiene point of view here – the sex can be as dirty as you’d like!

It’s hugely important when using sex toys, and particularly when using sex toys with a partner, that they are properly cleaned afterwards. Remember, sex toys can spread STIs, so if you’re using one together or on more than one partner, wrap it up!

Many actually recommend using condoms with your strap on dildo anyway, to make for easier clean up. Plus, lubricated condoms can make things feel even better.

Have Fun with It

If it’s your first time using a strap on, there may be a moment where you’re bumbling around putting it on and finding it all a little strange. It’s gonna feel weird at first, for both the giver and receiver, but just embrace it, have fun with it and laugh through any awkward moments. Trust us, once you’ve experienced how good it can feel, the confidence using a strap on will come!

Whatever kind of sex you enjoy, there’s a toy out there that can ensure your time between the sheets is even more satisfying. Just explore our full sex toy collection and you’re sure to find something to drive both you and your partner wild.